Want to buy my book? What an excellent idea. Probably the best idea you have had this year. But where to buy? The traditional place would be a bookshop. You could try your local butcher, but trust me, you’ll come out empty-handed. However - help is at hand! There is a new way to purchase books! You can now buy books on a new invention called the ‘inter-net’.
Buy the book on AMAZON
Buy the book from WATERSTONES
Buy the book from YOUR LOCAL INDEPENDENT BOOKSHOP
Buy the book from W.H. SMITH
If you don’t have your own credit card and you need permission from a parent, go get them now. Start screaming very, very loudly until they agree to buy at least one book. That’s right - don’t stop. They will buckle soon.